Friday The 13th Jokes (Funny)
Since its friday the 13th and probably some of you are feeling the "fear", why not let ourselves feel better with a few jokes.
First of all here's from the movie friday the 13th quotes:
Officer Dorf: What you been smoking, boy?
Jack: Smoke? Don't smoke causes cancer.
Officer Dorf: You know what I mean! What, you just get off a spaceship or something? Come on, Coloumbian gold, man. Hash, the grass, the weed, dig it?
Can you catch the joke on this Friday the 13th cartoon?
While this may sound crazy but worth trying. If you have a friday th 13 phobia, then gather some friends and play poker using friday the 13th cards.
I thought you might also want to know the interesting number 13 facts.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/13_(number)
Want to see some of Friday the 13th remake pictures?
Here's 3 funny friday the 13th jokes.
1. Roger left for work on Friday 13th morning. Friday was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire pay packet.
Finally, Roger appeared at home on Sunday night, and obviously he was confronted by his angry wife, Martha who castigated Roger for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally, Martha stopped the nagging and said to Roger, 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?'
Roger replied grimly, 'That would be fine with me.'
Monday went by and he didn't see his Martha. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.
On Thursday, the swelling went down just enough so that Roger he could see Martha a little out of the corner of his left eye.
2.A man bought a new Mercedes to celebrate his wife leaving him and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.
"There's no way they can catch a Mercedes," he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100.....Then the reality of the situation hit him. "What am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.
"It's been a long hard day, this is the end of my shift and it's Friday the 13th. I don't feel like more paperwork, I don't need the frustration or the overtime, so if you can give me a really good excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go."
The guy thinks about it for a second and says, "Last week my nagging wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back!"
"Have a nice weekend," said the officer.
3. MICHAEL: It's Friday the 13th. Do you have any superstitions?
CHAD: I think it's unlucky to have superstitions.
Q: Why aren't people afraid of Friday the 13th?
A1: The lights are out, the windows are boarded up, the lawns aren't cut. Everyday is Friday the 13th in America now.
A2: After losing their home, job, and 401k nothing scares them now!
Q: How is the Freddy Krueger like George W Bush?
A: They're both famous for scaring the shit out of people!
Special thanks to jokes4us.com for the funny friday the 13th jokes.
Last but not least, enjoy the video below.
Read More......
First of all here's from the movie friday the 13th quotes:
Officer Dorf: What you been smoking, boy?
Jack: Smoke? Don't smoke causes cancer.
Officer Dorf: You know what I mean! What, you just get off a spaceship or something? Come on, Coloumbian gold, man. Hash, the grass, the weed, dig it?
Can you catch the joke on this Friday the 13th cartoon?
While this may sound crazy but worth trying. If you have a friday th 13 phobia, then gather some friends and play poker using friday the 13th cards.
I thought you might also want to know the interesting number 13 facts.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/13_(number)
Want to see some of Friday the 13th remake pictures?
Here's 3 funny friday the 13th jokes.
1. Roger left for work on Friday 13th morning. Friday was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire pay packet.
Finally, Roger appeared at home on Sunday night, and obviously he was confronted by his angry wife, Martha who castigated Roger for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally, Martha stopped the nagging and said to Roger, 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?'
Roger replied grimly, 'That would be fine with me.'
Monday went by and he didn't see his Martha. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.
On Thursday, the swelling went down just enough so that Roger he could see Martha a little out of the corner of his left eye.
2.A man bought a new Mercedes to celebrate his wife leaving him and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.
"There's no way they can catch a Mercedes," he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100.....Then the reality of the situation hit him. "What am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.
"It's been a long hard day, this is the end of my shift and it's Friday the 13th. I don't feel like more paperwork, I don't need the frustration or the overtime, so if you can give me a really good excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go."
The guy thinks about it for a second and says, "Last week my nagging wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back!"
"Have a nice weekend," said the officer.
3. MICHAEL: It's Friday the 13th. Do you have any superstitions?
CHAD: I think it's unlucky to have superstitions.
Q: Why aren't people afraid of Friday the 13th?
A1: The lights are out, the windows are boarded up, the lawns aren't cut. Everyday is Friday the 13th in America now.
A2: After losing their home, job, and 401k nothing scares them now!
Q: How is the Freddy Krueger like George W Bush?
A: They're both famous for scaring the shit out of people!
Special thanks to jokes4us.com for the funny friday the 13th jokes.
Last but not least, enjoy the video below.
Read More......
